Something that many divorced parents struggle with is finding a good co-parenting plan. Debates over schedules and holidays can make finding a plan turn into a headache. However, there are some good strategies to use for coming up with a plan that’ll let you both co-parent more consistently…
Co-Parenting Plan: Find One That Works
Figure out what’s important
The first part of getting a co-parenting plan worked out is knowing your priorities. Think about things like important dates and holidays you want to spend with the kids. Then, list them in order of importance to give yourself a frame of reference for what you deem a priority.
While you do this, try to encourage your ex to make their own list too. Once you both know what you each see as a priority, then you can start working on finding a solution. If your spouse doesn’t want to share, try to remember from past experiences which days they valued more than others.
Use evidence to support your stance
This is something that many people miss when working out a co-parenting plan. Think about the past year and those important dates you picked. Then, check if there’s any evidence to help you with your claims.
For example, if your ex had Thanksgiving last year, it’s not unreasonable for you to ask for them this year. You can even plan for the current year as well. If you won’t have free time from work for a vacation until July, then maybe you can see if June will work for your ex to have their vacation with the kids. Either way, good evidence will help you both find something that works.
Work towards compromises
Of course, compromises are a large part of a good co-parenting plan. You can try and compromise on one matter to gain something else in return. Let’s say your ex wants the kids to stay over on their birthday. If that date isn’t high on your priority list, then offer it as part of a compromise.
Of course, once you offer something, then you can ask for something in return. Maybe now you’ll be able to have the kids stay over at your place for their birthdays. Swapping compromises is a great way to develop a complete and satisfying co-parenting plan.
