Dating after your divorce can be tricky in it’s own right. However, what happens when you end up in a new relationship? Many people do experience some post-divorce relationship struggles. There’s a few common reasons as to why this may be…
Post-Divorce Relationship Struggles
You’re not ready
Divorce is a very big, and pretty life changing event. Therefore, it makes sense that it’s not something you can get over in a short amount of time. In fact, it can take a long time to fully heal and move on from your divorce-related trauma. However, it’s important to take this time and grieve what you lost.
If you don’t take the time to process your divorce, then your relationships will suffer as a result. Things will always feel a bit “off”, and it’s because you’re just trying to replace what you have lost. Until you can fully accept what has happened, then it might be best to avoid rushing into new relationships all together.
It’s natural to start a new relationship and have some expectations. After all, your expectations set the sort-of “benchmark” for your relationships. However, many times some unrealistic or skewed expectations can lead to post-divorce relationship struggles.
After your divorce, your expectations might be low, and you won’t have any faith or confidence in your partner. Or, they might be too high, holding your partner to a standard that isn’t fair for anyone. Both of these skewed expectations can prevent you from committing to a relationship, and cause things to fall apart.
The wrong people
While there are plenty of people who can be a great match for you, there are also ones who aren’t. Often times, post-divorce relationship struggles come from dating the wrong types of people. Usually, people in these situations either date people too similar, or too different to their ex.
Dating someone who is similar to your ex seems to make sense. After all, they may share a lot of traits you liked in your ex. However, they may also share some of the not-so-great ones which caused you problems. Plus, someone who is too different is someone who you probably won’t truly be able to connect with.